I can barely remember my life before my kids came along. SERIOUSLY, I have forgotten what it was like to exist before they entered the world in all their gorgeous chaos.
I have long forgotten what its like to pee alone or have my side of the bed to myself. I have forgotten what its like to eat a whole plate of food or not have to share my morning toast. I have forgotten what its like to not have to worry about someone other than myself, to do things at my own leisurely pace and to not have to have eyes at the back of my head, always on full alert. Kids are freaking serious business!
Which is why I can’t wait to go on our first childless holiday in over 4 years. You know, one that is longer than a weekend away and over in the blink of an eye. While I am 100 percent guaranteed to have a full-blown panic attack saying goodbye to them for 2 weeks, I plan on making the most of my holiday and milking it for all its worth!
Here are all the deliciously luxurious things I plan to make the most of, things that would be utterly impossible with two kids.
1. Packing for 1 instead of three. Well I will probably end up packing for the husband but at least it doest involve packing up an entire house and enough meds to make up a pharmacy.
2. Sleeping in. Every. Single. Day. I know many of you reading this are feeling a strong urge to punch me in the face right now. Sorry not sorry.
3. Walking new streets carrying a tiny sling bag and not having to cart prams, bags, bottles, sippy cups and superhero figurines around with us.
4. Holding hands with my man without little people nagging to be picked up.
5. Having sit down meals that don’t involve processed meat and mounds of ketchup. Even better, not being limited to restaurants with play areas.
6. Shopping with two hands! I can’t wait to browse the markets and explore things with my hands, to try on hats and sunglasses without putting a noose around your kid’s neck.
7. Lying in bed and ordering room service while watching chick flicks. Is it possible that there will be no fighting over the TV!?? Bubble Guppies can go stick it!
8. To sit and think and write and daydream. To have the luxury of doing these things without distraction.
9. Talking to my husband and finishing a conversation without Hold on, mommy’s talking! or Please shush:. Dad and I are trying to talk here guys!!
10. Going dancing and letting go knowing I wont have to worry about children the next day. The only nursing ill be doing is nursing a hangover.
11. Being spontaneous and not having to draw up a daily plan, to just go with the flow and let my mood decide where, when, who and how much. I mean when last right?
12. Early morning runs in the beautiful streets of Italy and Amsterdam. Just me and my thoughts.
13. Not having to feed and dress kids for two weeks. Better yet not having to clean up after them and do baskets of laundry! Thank God for Nana and Granddad!
14. To have the time to think and answer some of my own questions instead of the 3098 questions my children ask me everyday.
15. Reading an entire book without re-reading the same page approximately 34 times before admitting defeat.
Truth is I’m probably going to miss them too much to really enjoy half these things. In fact there is a high probability I’m going to the crazy person calling reception at 1am to send up extra pillows to fill the bed. And yes I may be sneaking in an item of their clothing to sleep with at night. Is that weird?
Heck, I can even see myself landing up at a kids play area looking rather suspicious staring at other people’s children. Not cause I want to steal them. Because I miss mine. And feel the need to fill my ears with happy screaming kids.
My husband is fully prepared for the meltdowns that are bound to occur at different intervals of the trip and although I know they will be in good hands, I will constantly be thinking about them and call them every chance I get.
Isn’t it funny how they become so apart of us, so entwined in our very being? So much so that being apart from them can feel unnatural, like we are going against our design as mothers. We become so used to the chaos and the neediness that it becomes our normal, our preference.
We need the time away, we know its good for us, we know we deserve it, we know they will be fine. Yet we wonder how we are going to survive being apart for so long and whether they are going to hate you for leaving them.
I guess only time will tell. Time to myself::Something I’m not used to having a whole lot of but something I intend to make the most of. I hope to come back freshly inspired and ready for our next season as a family.
What the longest you have been away from your kids? How did you handle it? What tips can you give me to make it more manageable and easy on the kids? (I thought a daily countdown calendar with a letter and small treat?) This mamma needs all the help she can get.