Am I the only one whose news feed resembled something a unicorn had thrown up all over yesterday? Ok, there may not have been rainbows spewed across my screen, but there were enough hearts, roses and cheesy love poems jamming my news feed to make up an 80’s music video.
Please don’t get my wrong – I’m no cynic when it comes to love. In fact I’m a Romance girl through and through – I have an endless list of favourite Romance movies I watch on repeat, I love the thought of drinking bubbly and sneaking kisses from my hubs on those picture perfect dates (or drinking bubbly anywhere for that matter), I have a major obsession with fairy lights and candles – I found myself saying the other day ” Its like each little bulb offers its own bit of magic, and together they can make a room glow with possibility.” – I know right? Where are the brown paper bags? As fate would have it, it seems I should be the one producing that 80’s music video.
But I just can’t seem to wrap my head around Valentines day these days. Or should i rather say, all the hype around it. It’s like every couple has been personally invited to the biggest Cheese Fest of the year and we all accept it without even reading the line up.
It could just be that my idea of the perfect day has slowly changed over the years. It must be stated for the record, my husband has always been the kind of guy to make big romantic gestures every chance he can get and for the last 13 years I have been the lucky girl on the receiving end all the spoils. But lately we are both just so damn tired to put in all the effort. Lately we are far less concerned with all the frills.
I’m going to honest here. As parents of small kids, what we really wanted was some peace and bloody quiet. Someone to make the whining and bickering stop, the NEEDINESS to go away for a little while. All we REALLY wanted was to be together, ALONE! Even if that meant not saying a word or leaving the house. Are we the only ones who feel this way?
So, once again my dear Valentine secured a babysitter, planned a lavish picnic and went online to book movies. And then Ster kinekor’s site crashed, because, well every other couple had the same idea as us – to end their perfect day watching “How to be Single”.
I was already feeling so tired having been up with a coughing kid all night and I found myself literally begging my husband to abandon the plan. Usually I would have done anything to get our plan to work but yesterday I just couldn’t bring myself to care enough or “want it enough”. Truth is i couldn’t bring myself to peel my tire ass off the couch.
So this is what we did instead and let me tell you, again for the record, its how I plan to spend every Valentines Day for the rest of my life on this planet. In fact, I don’t think we will ever be leaving the house for another date night again.
- Having already planned for my folks to have them for the afternoon my man dropped them off while I sat watching some series (Pretty little Liars just in case anyone was wondering.)
- On his return he told me to take off my clothes….. Whoa whoa! Don’t go getting all hot under the collar. He spent the next 45 minutes giving me a full body massage in the comfort of our lounge where I drifted in and out of sleep. I can’t remember when last I had a massage where i dribbled from beginning to end. I swear I didn’t even know my name when he was done.
- We watched The intern with Anna Hathaway and Robert de Nero. I Cannot tell you how much I LOVED this movie and how much emotion it stirred up in me! I went from wetting myself laughing to ugly crying to feeling all kinds of mushy inside. Seriously, its made its way into my top 10 movies of all time. The kind you can watch over and over again and love it more every time. Do yourself a favour!
- We dozed on the couch and may or may not have enjoyed a little “alone time”, depending on who is reading this. Mom, if its you – I cleaned out my fridge while your darling son-in-law read the Sunday paper. *Cough Cough
- After fetching our hooligans we picked up about 20 kilograms of the best sushi and made our way back home. After feeding and putting the kids to bed, trying my best not to rush it and remembering their role in our love story – we set the table with candles and sat sipping wine, eating sushi out of the box and let Billy Holiday serenade us. The best part? I was in my pjs and I didn’t have to worry about the soya sauce dripping off my chin. Because lets face it sushi is yummy but not very sexy.
- We sat talking about how rad our day together had been and how we have to put time aside to do things like this more often. It made us aware of how much we have neglected our once a week date nights and made us even more aware of how much we need them!
It was the perfect day and I didn’t even have to leave my house or put on a bra. ~NO fancy restaurant, or overpriced flowers (I mean COME ON!), No handmade card with declarations of how we are going to love each other to the end of time, no cheap chocolate or heart-shaped pancakes. For those who did make beautiful red heart-shaped pancakes, take pride. I probably secretly wish I was you with your high energy and larger than life capacity for such things. I’m clearly just admitting defeat here so bear with me.
But I’m sure we can all agree that as tired parents, we sometimes need to take the pressure off and remember its ok to turn down the expectation switch. Yes my man was still hell-bent on making me feel special but there were no fireworks necessary to make it a beautiful, intimate and soul-nourishing day. One that has left my love tank full and crazy excited to plan our next date night/day.
Because as they say “EVERYDAY is valentines day!” *Cheesy grin.